Vineyard Victimhood

A shirt for those who've suffered the particular indignity of summering where everyone else summers. The vineyard was beautiful, yes, but the other families were there too, and their children had better table manners. By August you'd developed a persistent low-grade resentment toward Sauvignon Blanc itself.

Wear this to signal that you understand the tragedy of abundance, the exhaustion of perpetual leisure, the way a perfectly adequate vacation can somehow feel like a personal failure. Your therapist will recognize the reference. So will anyone who's ever been forced to participate in a wine tasting they didn't ask to attend.

Unisex heavyweight tee. Runs true to size.